Rest. Reset. Evolve | letting go to make space to let in
If you could reset in any way right now, how would that look?
We've been socially conditioned to believe that rest and reset is something we earn or something we deserve. Even something we need to ask our bosses for permission in advance to do. The truth is that rest, and especially RESET - is something we need in order to SURVIVE).
re·set /rēˈset/ verb - To set again or differently. To set, adjust, readjust, to fix. To reboot, restart, reposition, rebuild. To refresh, reinstall, realign.
So what is the purpose of a reset? Each of these words have such a high vibration to them, don't they? so evolution-focused. Growth. Movement to a higher level.
In order to move to higher levels, though, we need to let go of lower ones. Ego death, I guess? Disidentification and detachment in order to make room for the new. You cannot evolve without cycles of death - because - how would we know what/when to evolve from? Things, people, hopes, ideas, plans... all need to die in order to create room for something new.
e·volve /ēˈvälv/ verb . to develop gradually, especially from a simple to a more complex form. // develop, grow, differentiate, change, adapt, acquire, redefine, thrive, flourish, transform, mature.
What are you willing to let go of in order to create room for something new, better, more suitable, complete? When you get caught up in thinking about what you've lost, are you able to follow up with thoughts about what you've gained? For the sake of your sanity and mental wellbeing - one cannot exist without the other. It's an interesting practice, actually, to really reflect on what you needed to lose in order to gain/make room for what you're grateful for now. Try it.
What have you been identifying with until now?
"Look at how amazing my life is."
"Look at how far I've come."
"Look at how wounded I am."
"Look at how eloquently well-spoken I am."
"Look at how secretive I am."
"Look at how attractive I am."
"Look at what I have."
"Look at how painful my life is."
"Look at how sad I am."
A reset, and subsequent evolution, comes from letting go, and man.... it is fuxking HARD to disidentify with an identity we've carried for a long time. Some identities were imprinted upon us before we even took our first breath. Other self-oriented or socially-prescribed identities have been around since our first weeks, first months, first years on this planet.
"What am I holding onto? What am I afraid of? Why..."
And there it is.... when you hold on to remnants of past lives and past identities, so too you're holding on to all the past pain. Disallowing growth. Showing total mistrust for new intentions. I was just writing about how ego murders relationships.... how can you be open to embracing transcendental relationship evolution (with yourself, with others, with life) on one hand but clinching onto dead or rotting identities, ego, and past pain on the other? I couldn't have written about ego without writing about Tolle, and even he talks ad nauseam about how there is rarely actually suffering right now - suffering lives in the past or in expectations for the future - but right this second most of us aren't suffering (i.e. right this second that you're holding your device or sitting at your computer consuming my words). If you're upset then it's about something that happened in the past or something you wish will happen in the future - which kind of beats the whole idea of practicing that zen-ish approach to here and now, doesn't it?
Do I focus on feeling hurt because it feeds my pain body? My ego feeds itself on convincing me that other people or certain circumstances are "bad" for me for x, y, z reasons?
How much of our suffering comes as a reflection of what we
refuse to let go of?
So what if we consciously made our intention for RESET or EVOLUTION to be specifically about diving head-first, feet-first, however-first - directly into our greatest source of pain/fear... be it breaking up, being alone, leaving home, skipping town, doing shrooms - I mean - whatever - what if fully ripping apart the pain, dissecting it, examining it, devouring it - then processing and re-processing to learn about it, understand it - in order to reset and evolve in one specific way:
TAKING BACK POWER.
You claw your way back from a sense of powerlessness by delving wholly into what took your power away in the first place - the identities you clung to out of fear / habit that never truly belonged to you. They say you can't heal trauma in the same environment that caused it - TRUE - but you can't heal wounds by refusing to look at them an analyzing the extent of the damage.
The reset / evolution doesn't come from silencing the pain - that just builds ego and emphasizes suffering (everything unspoken will return until it's brought to light). You also don't evolve by simply neutralizing the pain (i.e. traditional therapy, talking things out to death until you're bored of your own story and so systematically desensitized that it no longer affects you). The power, the SUPERPOWERS come from moving right-TF into those shadows and taking back every stitch of control they ever held.
What do I need in order to reset right now?
What do I need in order to evolve?
What can I let go of to create space for what I'd like to call in?
Which powers of mine have I lost sight of?
Which powers am I looking to acquire?